Letting go.

Dear You,

I can still remember it clearly, I think even down to the very first moment I started falling for you. At first, I wasn't even interested in you that way. But then we started hanging out together a lot, and I don't know how, but you just quietly wormed your way into my heart. I loved your smile, I loved your dry wit, I even loved your 'perasan'-ness. As time passed, we grew closer and feelings grew stronger. But then you said and did some things that were very hurtful to me. Maybe you don't feel as deeply as I feel for you. Maybe I cared for you more than you cared for me. That's why you had no qualms about hurting me like you did. I was really hurt and angry at being scorned like that. I even hated you then for making me feel that way. Because of that, I used to call you names whenever I talked about you to my friends.

But now, seing what I saw tonight, finally made me realise that I'm not angry anymore. I don't even hate you at all (maybe I never really hated you in the first place). Maybe we were not meant for each other. Maybe there is someone else out there for us, but we haven't found them yet. Maybe I just imagined a lot of things that weren't really there. I don't know. Life is full of 'maybe'-s and 'could be'-s. Fate brought us together, but perhaps not for the purpose that I had hoped for.

The hardest thing now is letting go and moving on with my life. I guess my heart will mend in time, and soon all that will be left is just a scar. With this letter, I hope that somehow, someday, I wil find it easier to let you go. But know this, you will always hold a place in my heart...even though it's not the no. 1 spot anymore........Thank you for all the memories, the good and the bad. I will always cherish them....

Wistfully yours,
Steph